Monday, September 18, 2006

El-P's Fucking Stash

So, this morning I woke up to Kevin Rowland force feeding me dexedrine and yelling "You will let me see the nugget ramp".
Needless to say, I was confused and after a quick knock to my head (thanks Kevin) I passed out.
When I came to El was yelling about me disrespecting what he calls "my sweet-ass awesome stash mother fucker" and that if I don't show it more respect I'm out of here. I then managed to snap this flick of El's "Sweet-ass awesome stash" before I was forced to tounge scrub the litter box.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

El returns From Ohio

So, for 2 1/2 days El was in Ohio on some business shit and I had the house all to myself. So, I figured while El was gone I'd live it up and have a good time and try to relax but, after El hit the ground in Ohio he started calling and yelling at me. Here's my list of insults/things I had to do/hear while he was gone.

1-Handwash his underwear.
2-Siphon bodily fluids out of his hot tub.
3-Shave myself from head to toe except for my eyebrows.
4-Shut up.
6-Help Mini-Beast (his cat) get out of heat.
7-Keep his foot on my neck (and This dirty sock) no matter what.

I did manage to have some fun however. Esplanade showed up on Friday and we...

1-Played a show together at a gallery/bar and killed it. (DibbsPlanade Style)
2-Pooped in El's bed then frolicked in it.
3-Ate all the cat litter while high on wood chips and god sauce.
4-Found out Mini-beast speaks 4 languages and can actually fly when she's drunk
5-Filled the hot tub w/vodka to see if El will get drunk when he soaks in it.
6-Had the living members of Dexys Midnight Runners come through and play on El's record then ghost Write all the songs/lyrics he had left to do. (more on this later)


El just called and he's like 3 minutes away from the house and I have to be outside, drunk & oiled up when I pay for his cab so I'll get back to this tomorrow.